Loneliness

I attended Yom Kippur services virtually again this year. 

For the first time in quite awhile, I watched Kol Nidre services as well, plus Yizkor. This gave me the opportunity to hear three sermons, all of which were excellent and thought-provoking. 

When the rabbi began her speech about loneliness by showing a picture of Taylor Swift, the congregants (and me) giggled at first. But very quickly I understood the point she was making. Because during the pandemic I have been learning about loneliness and the effect it can have on our emotional and physical health. Taylor Swift is an incredibly famous celebrity. Thanks to her talent and hard work, the world is her oyster. She can afford to do just about anything. There is no doubt she has many friends. But because she is so famous, her life is restricted. She likely has to have bodyguards everywhere she goes. She can't go for a walk or catch a movie on a whim. Fans love her, but they also constantly want something from her. Anonymity is not an option, unless she considers going incognito. 

So you might say, "Well, I'm not gonna feel sorry for Taylor Swift. Her money can buy her happiness." And I get that. But loneliness is still loneliness. 

Chronic loneliness can cause depression, anxiety, even thoughts of suicide. It can lead to abuse of alcohol and drugs. It can also contribute to chronic health conditions such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and diabetes. Loneliness can be as dangerous as smoking.

People of any age can experience loneliness. Older adults and people with disabilities can have the added difficulties of lack of reliable caregivers, accessible transportation, mobility issues, and financial limitations that make it difficult to be social. 

There is help available if you are lonely. While social media like Facebook can actually increase feelings of loneliness, the Internet can lead to sources for connection, such as meetup groups for hobbies, support groups, book clubs, companionship, and lifelong learning - both in person and online. If you are a person of faith, consider contacting a local house of worship to find out about in-person and streaming events. With anything you try, it's important to attend more than once. Friendships and connections are usually not instantaneous. It can take time to feel comfortable in a new group. 

librarianintx

Falls are not a normal part of aging

Falling doesn't have to be in your future. 

It is true that older adults are more prone to falls, and more likely to injure themselves when they do fall. 

Falls can lead to injury, immobility, fear of future falls, and loss of independence. Immobility, even for short periods of time, can make you susceptible to infections, blood clots, and pneumonia. 

Lifestyle changes can greatly reduce your risk of falling. Here are a few examples:

1) Remove throw rugs and reduce clutter to avoid tripping

2) Have adequate lighting in your home

3) Be aware that some medications have side effects of dizziness and/or drowsiness

4) If you must drink alcohol, drink in moderation

5) Ascend and descend stairs cautiously

6) See a doctor if you are experiencing dizziness

7) Consider physical therapy to address balance concerns. Some physical therapists will work with you at home. You can also find balance exercises on YouTube. Yoga and Tai Chi will also help with balance. Cardio and strength training are important forms of exercise, but so is balance.

Finally, if you are falling, or close to falling, no matter how old you are, please consider a mobility device such as a cane, walker, or rollator. Don't let pride, ageism, or stigma stop you. A mobility device will not 100% prevent you from falling, but it will reduce your chances, and will also give you the stability and confidence to keep moving. A functional medicine specialist or physical therapist can assist you on deciding which device is best for you.

For more information, visit: https://www.ncoa.org/older-adults/health/prevention/falls-prevention

librarianintx

Keys to Longevity

 Jimmy Carter will celebrate his 99th birthday tomorrow.  

 Ninety nine years on this earth is an impressive accomplishment. 

For President Carter, it is even more more reason to celebrate, given the factors that could have shortened his life. 

His father and siblings died of pancreatic cancer. 

In 2015, he was diagnosed with melanoma that spread to his liver in brain. 

In 2019, he had a series of falls that resulted in broken bones. 

Seven months ago, he entered hospice. 

Most people are in hospice care for six months or less. 

The 8 general principles of good health are:

    fresh air

    hydration

    sunlight

    nutritious food

    sleep 

    exercise

    meditation

    feeling in control

The article I'll include at the end of this post outlines four habits that have likely contributed to President Carter's longevity: 

#1: A sense of purpose: Community involvement and volunteering have been a hallmark of Jimmy Carter's post presidential existence. Through his work with Habit for Humanity, he has helped to build, renovate, and repair thousands of homes in more than a dozen countries. 

Helping other people can help you.

#2: Strong family ties: Jimmy and Rosalyn Carter have been married for 77 years, and maintain close relationships with their children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren.  

Family keeps you young, engaged, connected.

#3: Regular exercise: President Carter was a runner into his early 80's, then switched to swimming and walking. He's also been an avid bike rider. 

Exercise is good for mental as well as physical health. 

#4: Faith: For nearly forty years, President Carter regularly taught Sunday School at the Plains, Georgia Baptist church where he and Rosalyn attend services. 

Faith fuels your spirit. Feeling connected to a Higher Power can help your body and your mind. 

Evidence is showing that lifestyle can influence both your quality as well as quantity of life. Making positive changes in the eight principles of good health and other habits can help you prevent chronic conditions, even if you have a family history of disease. 

librarianintx

https://news.yahoo.com/jimmy-carter-turns-99

 

Big Brother 9/17 episode

I'm behind as usual.

But I'm still in mourning over Izzy's eviction.

While I don't like it when players leave abruptly when they're voted out, and of course I do not condone any form of violence, I laughed out loud when Izzy pushed Cam away and said, "I'll be seeing you next week, Piggy." It was just the right amount of playful sass, but I know she was also so upset that Cam's plan to get her out worked.

My other thought:

Jared is playing a terrible mental game. He and Cirie are still in the game because luckily he can win comps. Cory was absolutely right in everything he said about Jared and Cirie. Jared was trying to bulldoze his way through multiple lies. And Cirie has become entangled in too many alliances.

I'm rooting for Matt and Jag.

librarianintx 

Big Brother 9/7 Episode - Spoilers

Oh BB, how you toy with us Jag fans.

First you made us think Jag was going out on a unanimous vote when Cam was HOH.

Then you led us to believe the majority was going to flip and kick out Jag instead of Red when Jared was HOH.

But they didn't. 

Jag survived another week.

Whew.

But this week - Cam is in power again, and everyone except Bowie Jane is waiting for the ax to fall.

My prediction: Cam will nominate Matt and Jared. But Izzy and Cirie are also strong possibilities. 

Cam had to watch his bromance partner walk out the door. He is out for revenge. 

I don't dislike Red. I think he was a good competitor. But he made a huge mistake when he believed Jared and didn't have a heart to heart with Cam. I don't believe Cam was throwing Red under the bus. He was simply telling Jared what J wanted to hear. He was playing the game.

librarianintx 

Memories

Relationships can be difficult. 

With family

With friends

But it's important to nurture and grow relationships.

To build connections. 

To avoid loneliness and isolation.

To learn from each other.

And to make memories that will sustain you.

Yesterday we remembered someone on his special birthday.

Memories of fun times, inside jokes, and shared laughter brought smiles and comfort to ease the grief.

This is what life is all about.

Make your mark on the world.

Share yourself with others.

Live to be cherished ... celebrated .... by your loved ones who will instill your legacy in future generations. 

The body dies, but the spirit ... and the memories ... are everlasting. 

librarianintx

Big Brother 8/31 Episode - Spoilers!

I haven't seen Sunday night's episode yet, and I'm late posting about Thursday. 

But I have to say THANK YOU to Matt for saving Jag!! My excitement might be short-lived. Cam or Red could have won HOH, and could have targeted Jag again, or Matt if they found out who thwarted their plans.

But for right now I'm happy. It was so delicious to be in suspense, wondering if Jag was going to walk out the front door. Yay Matt for making a big move!

I would love to see Matt, Jag, and Cirie as the final three.

It will be interesting to see how Jared reacts to someone saving Jag instead of Blue.

librarianintx 

Big Brother - My Thoughts BEFORE the POV Comp

I think it's smart to keep Hisam in the dark and plan to back door him.

But it IS a dangerous plan - because Hisam is a strong competitor.

If he is picked for POV, he could win.

And then what will Felicia do? Keep the noms the same?

Neither Cameron or Jag are in her alliance, so she likely will. 

It's so hard - I like everyone!

I don't even dislike Hisam - I just think he's playing a bad game. 

He's not a terrible person, but he needs to work on not talking down to people - especially women - who are the majority of his alliance. 

It will be interesting to see what happens. 

There should have been drinking a game with Sunday's episode - take a swig every time Hisam said how happy he was to be safe for the week.

librarianintx

Salads

You may have heard the term "girl dinner" lately - for me this summer has been all about salads.

I haven't been much of a salad eater until now. I have had trouble chewing and swallowing lettuce, and I felt like I needed to concentrate on higher calorie food to maintain my weight.

But I know salads can be very healthy, and I am enjoying experimenting with different ingredients. My salads are not unique or elaborate. But I have liked everything I've made. And it feels good to create something that is fresh, healthy, and usually quick to assemble (some faster than others). Here are a few:

Quinoa chicken salad:

Quinoa

Diced chicken 

Grape Tomatoes

Cucumbers

Homemade dressing:

Olive oil

Apple Cider vinegar

Cumin

Garlic powder

Onion powder

Italian Seasoning 

Salt

Shrimp spinach salad:

Shrimp

Baby Spinach

Avocado

Grape Tomatoes 

Avocado goddess dressing 

Cobb salad:

Diced chicken 

Hard boiled egg

Baby Spinach

Avocado

Grape Tomatoes

Avocado goddess dressing

Chicken salad:

Diced chicken 

Grapes

Ground walnuts

Mayo

Italian Seasoning 

Onion powder 

Salt

Baby Spinach

I want to experiment more. I know yogurt is a healthier alternative to mayo, but I haven't tried that. I've also made tuna salad, salmon salad, egg salad with avocado, and pasta salad with chicken.

Librarianintx 

Big Brother - My Thoughts So Far

I haven't been watching television lately, so it feels good to be watching a show again.

I have not seen last night's episode, so I don't know who was voted out.

I'm very pleased with how diverse the cast is. Honestly, there isn't anyone I don't like yet. But that can change on a dime. I still like Hisam, but I think his emphasis on truth and transparency is coming across as controlling and being arrogant. He needs to check himself before he wrecks his game.

While I don't have a favorite yet, I will say I'm a big fan of Cirie, and would love to see her go far. I think she has the fortitude and game play to win, but I do worry that she and Jared are being seen together too much, and she was showing motherly concern when he was in the Nether World.

Kudos to BB for having a Deaf houseguest this season. I read a lengthy article about the work they have done and the technology they have implemented to level the playing field for Matt, including making sure the audio veto competition from Wednesday night was accessible for him.

librarianintx 

Trying...and Doing

It wasn't such a big thing.

People do it all the time.

She's done it before 

Made it to work after a poor night of sleep.

Doing it doesn't make her special 

Or inspirational 

Or important

But it did make her proud of herself 

Something she is learning to be

And she felt resilient

An adjective she's longed to feel worthy of

She accomplished more than she thought she could

Both with her brain and her body

Fatigue did not win today.

Each time she has even a small victory.

She congratulations herself

And makes a space to remember 

The next time she tells herself she can't 

librarianintx

Orange Clothes

I promise, this is not a post about college football.

It's just a background story.

I went to UT for grad school.

My mom's side of the family is mostly an Aggie dynasty.

If you're from Texas, or know about college football, you get it.

I have never owned a stitch of orange clothing.

When I went to UT, I bought a school shirt that was not orange (not easy to find)

But things change.

People change.

My family still bleeds maroon.

THAT hasn't changed.

But I decided I don't have to dislike orange anymore.

I now have two orange shirts 

One long sleeve, one short sleeve.

I have an orange jacket.

I even have orange undies. 😊

Call it orange

Tangerine

Dreamsicle?

Coral?

It's new and different and I like it.

Change can be fun.

librarianintx

Brown Sandals

Silly how happy my new sandals have made me.

But it has been a journey finding BROWN sandals that fit my tiny feet. Little girls do not pine away for brown sandals apparently (See what I did there?)

But I have been. I wear brown quite a bit. The brown sandals I've been wearing for years were looking like the Velveteen Rabbit. They were hanging on by a thread. And this matchy girl can not wear another color sandal with brown pants or capris. Shudder.

My mother did her best. She lives for a shopping challenge. Before the pandemic she went to MULTIPLE stores looking for size two brown sandals. Not just the size, but there were other requirements: I can't wear backless sandals. Little to no heel. And the new trend where the strap comes high up on the ankle - can't do it.

My mom had her work cut out for her.

After an exhaustive search, she found two pairs for me. One was more of a nude color. Not brown. The other pair were the color of mud. Not cute. But they were the best she could find. And I appreciated her efforts.

Then came the pandemic. Other problems took precedence, and I forgot about trivial pursuits like new sandals.

But recently I renewed my quest. And it was MUCH easier this time. Amazon had several brown sandals to choose from. Buying shoes online can turn out great or badly. But yay, finally success! Cute brown sandals that fit!

I am on my way to work. The library is freezing. But fashion over comfort, girl. I couldn't wait to wear them.

Thank you for your years of service old brown sandals.

librarianintx 

You Can Not Win and Still Succeed

Reality shows have demonstrated that we can come up short in one aspect of our journey but still succeed in life.

Plenty of "American Idol" contestants have failed to win the crown, but have used the exposure from the show to craft careers in the entertainment business. Jennifer Hudson is a primary example of this. She finished seventh in her season. Now she has a Tony, an Emmy, an Oscar, and a Grammy. And a talk show.

Ali Stroker and Alex Newell both competed on the reality show "The Glee Project." Neither won the show. But both ended up on "Glee." And both are now Tony award winners. Further, both are history-making Tony award winners. Ali is the first wheelchair user and Alex shares the distinction of being the first non-binary individual to win a Tony (J Harrison Ghee won the same night).

Ali and Alex are shining examples of two important life reminders:

Failure is often one (or more) steps in the path to success.

Success is possible if you work hard and believe in yourself. 

"Corny" but true.

See what I did there? :)

librarianintx 

Mobility Aids

I was 16 years old when I got my first mobility aid - a scooter called an Amigo.

I used scooters to get around at undergrad and grad schools, and portable wheelchairs when I went to places off campus that required a lot of walking. 

As an adult I experienced a lengthy stretch when I rarely needed a mobility device. I wasn't cured; I still had Muscular Dystrophy. But I was stable. My form of MD is static, or very slowly progressive. I wasn't traveling much,  and I didn't go to many places that required a lot of walking. Only very occasionally did I use my portable wheelchair. More often I would borrow a wheelchair or scooter at the place where I went, such as a museum or a convention center.

Walking, more specifically balance, became an issue during the pandemic, as I was also going through menopause (a fantastic combo, let me tell you!) I wasn't falling, but I became fearful of falling. And my legs ached. The hills in my apartment complex became difficult to manage, as I strove to continue exercising. 

I delayed the inevitable, but finally admitted to myself that I needed an assistive device. Because I want to keep walking for as long as I can, I chose a rollator this time instead of a scooter. 

My friends got me a petite rollator, designed for someone vertically challenged. :) "She" is purple and I named "her" Poppy. I also now have a cane. "He" is blue and another friend came up with the name "Cobalt" for him.

I could feel sad that I need assistive devices again. But I choose to look at the situation more positively. I am lucky there are mobilty aids available that can keep me both ambulatory and safe.

There are days I still struggle with ableism, and ageism. Rollators and canes are for "old" people. They are often used as fodder for jokes and ridicule. But when I use Poppy and Cobalt, I hold my head up and walk with confidence. I know I need them, and my life is enriched by having them, and using them.

I gave them names because I name all of my medical equipment. And because I think telling people their names if the subject arises can be an ice breaker. It's not because I'm trying to act like a child. It's just a quirky aspect of my personality. 

librarianintx

American Idol

I have no one to blame but myself. 

I know better.

The last time I seriously watched, I voted religiously for James Dubin.

He finished fourth.

I was wrecked for him.

But we all know that you don't have to win AI to become a star.

Many times, it's better not to win.

But We'ani deserved better than Top 5.

She is a star.

She will have a career.

I can't wait to hear the music she creates.

In the meantime, I will savor her AI performances - especially "Something's Got a Hold On Me," "I Have Nothing," and her audition song, "Anyone."

Don't give up We'ani.

Continue to be "diligent"

You will have your place in the "Diva Club" 

Not "diva" as in attitude -

"Diva" as in talent.

librarianintx 

May is National Osteoporosis Month

Here's a great site about National Osteoporosis Month from the Bone Health and Osteoporosis Foundation: https://www.bonehealthandosteoporosis.org/awareness-month/

On the site you can find

a social media toolkit

kick off events

on demand webinars

a Four Day Bone Health Challenge (starts on May 18)

podcast episodes

information on support and how to share your story

Many people think that osteoporosis is a disease you get when you're older. And for some, that is true. But young people can develop the condition as well. 

Osteoporosis means that you have low bone density. This can lead to fractures. 

Risk factors include:

• Getting older
• Being small and thin
• Having a family history of osteoporosis
• Taking certain medicines, like steroids
  
• Being a white or Asian woman
  

Taking vitamin D + calcium and eating calcium-rich foods can help keep your bones strong.

Exercise can also help, especially strength-training exercises such as working with weights and resistance bands. Certain yoga poses are also good for your bones. Walking outside and stair climbing can be beneficial. But if you have osteoporosis, consult a doctor before you begin an exercise regiment. 

Balance and fall prevention are also important components of osteoporosis treatment. 

There are medications to treat osteoporosis. Some are oral medicines, while others are injections and infusions. An endocrinologist can inform you about the risks and benefits of each medication. 

For women who are peri-menopausal or menopausal, hormone replacement therapy can help maintain bone density.

Osteoporosis medicines can be controversial, as can eating dairy and taking supplements for the condition. Consult with a doctor, preferably an endocrinologist, to create a care plan that works for you. 

I was diagnosed with osteoporosis at the age of 38. Because of swallowing difficulties, I have not been able to take oral medications. So far I have done the following to treat my osteoporosis:

two years of daily injections (Forteo)

one infusion (Reclast)

and two doses of Prolia (twice a year injection)

I am also on hormone replacement therapy, I take a calcium and vitamin D supplement, I eat calcium-rich foods (cheese, milk, cottage cheese, yogurt), and I exercise (walking, weights, balance exercises, and some yoga).

I have been extremely fortunate that what I am doing seems to be helping. After a dip in my bone density following the stoppage of oral contraceptive use, I have seen gains in my bone density, likely due to the Prolia. In particular, the bone density in my femoral neck increased quite a bit. I am now officially in osteopenia (a precursor to osteoporosis) in my forearm and femoral neck. I am still in the osteoporosis range in my hips.

It's never too early to think about keeping your bones strong. If you don't like dairy, or are sensitive to it, you can eat things like leafy greens and beans. Be active - weights, walking, and hiking are better for your bones than bike riding or swimming. Learn about what medicines can make you more susceptible to bone density issues.

Learn more about osteoporosis here: https://www.niams.nih.gov/health-topics/bone-health-and-osteoporosis

librarianintx

Disability Book Week

Disability Book Week occurs every year during the week of April 23 - 29. It is a worldwide celebration of books with disability characters or themes. 

Learn more about it at https://disabilitybookweek.org 

 

Here are some memoirs I've read, written by people with disabilities:

Being Huemann by Judy Heumann

Every Day is a Gift by Tammy Duckworth

If At Birth You Don't Succeed by Zach Anner

I'm Special: And Other Lies We Tell Ourselves by Ryan O'Connell

Haben: The DeafBlind Woman Who Conquered Harvard Law by Haben Girma

Find Another Dream by Maysoon Zayid

Between Two Kingdoms by Suleika Jouard

Not Fade Away by Rebecca Alexander

The Pretty One by Keah Brown

We Carry Kevan by Kevan Chandler 

Fast Girl: A Life Spent Running from Madness by Suzy Favor Hamilton

Laughing at My Nightmare and Strangers Assume My Girlfriend is My Nurse by Shane Burcaw 

It's Not What It Looks Like by Molly Burke

 

And here are some fiction titles with disability themes / characters that I've read:

The Fundamentals of Caregiving by Jonathan Evison 

Wonder by R.J. Palacio

Good Kings, Bad Kings by Susan Nussbaum

Out of My Mind by Sharon M. Draper

The Weight of Zero by Karen Fortunati

 

And here are some titles on my wish list:

How Lucky: A Novel by Will Leitch

Just Don't Fall: A Hilariously True Story of Childhood, Cancer, Amputation, Romantic Yearning, Truth, and Olympic Greatness by Josh Sundquist

The Sign for Home: A Novel by Blair Fell 

Sitting Pretty: The View from My Ordinary, Resilient Disabled Body by Rebekah Taussig

Access Your Drive and Enjoy Your Ride: A Guide to Achieving Your Dreams From a Person with a Disability by Lauren Spencer

Disability Visibility and Year of the Tiger: An Activist's Life by Alice Wong

 

Disability representation is so important. People with disabilities need to see themselves represented in books. 

 

Ali Stroker, Tony award winning actress, and wheelchair user, has written two middle grade books where the main character is a female wheelchair user: The Chance to Fly and Cut Loose!

 

Maysoon Zayid, comedienne and activist with Cerebral Palsy, will release a graphic novel next year called Shiny Misfits, about a dancer with Cerebral Palsy. 

 

And Ryan O'Connell, actor with Cerebral Palsy, has written a book called Just By Looking at Him: A Novel, about a gay TV writer with Cerebral Palsy.

 

librarianintx

 

Colors

Growing up, I don't remember wearing the color orange. It wasn't a part of my fashion to my knowledge. Pink, especially light pink, is the color I have been drawn to and obsessed with for most of my life. I see a pink shirt. I want it. The end.

Football at any level is a BIG DEAL in Texas. Texas A&M and the University of Texas have a huge rivalry. My mother, who did not go to A&M but is one of their biggest supporters, watches UT games specifically to root AGAINST them. Now that's a rivalry.

My family has bred, raised and graduated a pack of Aggies, including an uncle, cousins, my sister and my three nieces. Marrying Aggies has become a dynasty in my immediate family: my sister and two of nieces have or will soon marry men they met at A&M.

I earned my Master's degree at UT. I would have attended A&M but they don't have a Master's in Library Science. 

A&M colors are maroon and white. University of Texas colors are burnt orange and white. 

During my time at UT, I bought exactly one UT shirt. It was not burnt orange. I did not attend any sporting events. 

By the way, I didn't like oranges or orange juice when I was younger either. That's how far the indoctrination went..

But as you go through life, your likes and dislikes change. I like oranges and orange juice now. And - gasp - I am dabbling in wearing the color orange. Not burnt orange - there IS a diffence. This is regular orange. 

I now own two orange shirts - one long-sleeve and one short. I also have two pair of orange indies and a pair of orange socks.

I have firmly told the other clothes that there will be no discrimination or bullying of the orange clothing. My closet is an inclusive space where all colors are welcome.

Change is good.

Change is growth.

But while all colors now have a place, pink still reigns Supreme.

Some things stay the same.

librarianintx 

Dalai Lama

Yup. I'm going there.

I was disgusted before I saw the video.

Now I'm even more disgusted. 

By his actions.

And by the people trying to justify what he did because he's a "spiritual leader", a "holy man".

The justifications are ridiculous. 

"He was just joking around."

"In Tibetan culture, this was not scandalous "

Please tell me this is not true.

In what culture is it acceptable for a man to forcibly kiss a child on the lips and then ask him to suck his tongue?

It's not the least bit humorous either. 

What started as an innocent request by the boy for a hug became a completely inappropriate and potentially traumatizing situation for that child, as an audience sat there laughing nervously. 

Hopefully no parent will ever let their child near him again.

If any good comes out of this, maybe we can have more conversations about the importance of a child's bodily autonomy and their right to say no at any point to physical affection, from anyone, even if they were the one to initiate it.

librarianintx