http://zenhabits.net/toolset
1) Meditation
2) Be awake - in the present
3) Watch urges - don't act on them
4) Watch ideals - let them go
5) Accept people and life as they are - stop trying to change people or fight against a certain situation
6) Let go of expectations - we cause our pain through expectations
7) Become okay with discomfort - learn to try new things
8) Watch your resistance - it's what makes you uncomfortable, makes you give up
9) Be curious - don't let fear of failure stop you
10) Be grateful
11) Let go of control - We can't control life, but we think we can, and that causes stress.
12) Be compassionate - to others and to yourself
librarianintx
Thursday, February 27, 2014
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Life
I understand that what scares me in life is the often sudden occurrences, anything from a thunderstorm gathering strength to anger exploding from a usual calm environment, from a debilitating illness to an accident in the blink of an eye, or a phone call transmitting the tragic news that a loved one has left us. I can use hand sanitizer and wash my hands multiple times a day, but the germs decide who to invade and who to spare. I can have contingency strategies so I'm never alone in a storm, but I cannot plan for the storm that gathers fuel from a cloudless sky and Texas heat. I can hold my dear ones close and treasure every moment with them, but nothing I do will change when their time on earth is complete.
My fears are about the swiftness of life events, and my complete lack of control over them. Of course I have some control over my life. But I can't stop a car crash from happening, or keep someone from falling and hurting themselves, or cure a devastating illness. I don't have that kind of power, and I never will.
Worry is the most useless activity known to man. Laying on a bed and doing nothing is still more productive than worry. Worry solves nothing and won't change anything. You can't worry so diligently and so earnestly that you will be able to change what happens in life. Worry steals your imagination, your creativity, your physical and emotional health, your time on this earth to be productive, successful, and happy. Worry is poisonous. And worry is addictive.
At this point in my life I'm not looking for a cure for my worry. Sometimes worry can be like a stubborn grass fire. You can stomp and kick dirt on it, but the flames only grow more intense. I have found a treatment, however. You don't need a prescription for it, and you don't buy it over the counter. The treatment is called mindfulness. Living in the moment. I have come to the realization that as I move through my day, my mind spends way too much time either reliving the past and experiencing guilt, or ruminating about the future and experiencing fear or concern. When I take the time to notice this, I literally say "stop" out loud (when possible), and then I say, "Stay in the moment. Right now, everything is fine."
Mindfulness works. But like a muscle in the body, it needs to be exercised regularly. I'm hoping that over time, mindfulness will make the worry less of an issue in my life.
The only certainty in life is the unpredictability of our existence. I have to learn to accept that, abide by it, and enjoy my life in the face of that.
librarianintx
My fears are about the swiftness of life events, and my complete lack of control over them. Of course I have some control over my life. But I can't stop a car crash from happening, or keep someone from falling and hurting themselves, or cure a devastating illness. I don't have that kind of power, and I never will.
Worry is the most useless activity known to man. Laying on a bed and doing nothing is still more productive than worry. Worry solves nothing and won't change anything. You can't worry so diligently and so earnestly that you will be able to change what happens in life. Worry steals your imagination, your creativity, your physical and emotional health, your time on this earth to be productive, successful, and happy. Worry is poisonous. And worry is addictive.
At this point in my life I'm not looking for a cure for my worry. Sometimes worry can be like a stubborn grass fire. You can stomp and kick dirt on it, but the flames only grow more intense. I have found a treatment, however. You don't need a prescription for it, and you don't buy it over the counter. The treatment is called mindfulness. Living in the moment. I have come to the realization that as I move through my day, my mind spends way too much time either reliving the past and experiencing guilt, or ruminating about the future and experiencing fear or concern. When I take the time to notice this, I literally say "stop" out loud (when possible), and then I say, "Stay in the moment. Right now, everything is fine."
Mindfulness works. But like a muscle in the body, it needs to be exercised regularly. I'm hoping that over time, mindfulness will make the worry less of an issue in my life.
The only certainty in life is the unpredictability of our existence. I have to learn to accept that, abide by it, and enjoy my life in the face of that.
librarianintx
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