Loneliness

I attended Yom Kippur services virtually again this year. 

For the first time in quite awhile, I watched Kol Nidre services as well, plus Yizkor. This gave me the opportunity to hear three sermons, all of which were excellent and thought-provoking. 

When the rabbi began her speech about loneliness by showing a picture of Taylor Swift, the congregants (and me) giggled at first. But very quickly I understood the point she was making. Because during the pandemic I have been learning about loneliness and the effect it can have on our emotional and physical health. Taylor Swift is an incredibly famous celebrity. Thanks to her talent and hard work, the world is her oyster. She can afford to do just about anything. There is no doubt she has many friends. But because she is so famous, her life is restricted. She likely has to have bodyguards everywhere she goes. She can't go for a walk or catch a movie on a whim. Fans love her, but they also constantly want something from her. Anonymity is not an option, unless she considers going incognito. 

So you might say, "Well, I'm not gonna feel sorry for Taylor Swift. Her money can buy her happiness." And I get that. But loneliness is still loneliness. 

Chronic loneliness can cause depression, anxiety, even thoughts of suicide. It can lead to abuse of alcohol and drugs. It can also contribute to chronic health conditions such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and diabetes. Loneliness can be as dangerous as smoking.

People of any age can experience loneliness. Older adults and people with disabilities can have the added difficulties of lack of reliable caregivers, accessible transportation, mobility issues, and financial limitations that make it difficult to be social. 

There is help available if you are lonely. While social media like Facebook can actually increase feelings of loneliness, the Internet can lead to sources for connection, such as meetup groups for hobbies, support groups, book clubs, companionship, and lifelong learning - both in person and online. If you are a person of faith, consider contacting a local house of worship to find out about in-person and streaming events. With anything you try, it's important to attend more than once. Friendships and connections are usually not instantaneous. It can take time to feel comfortable in a new group. 

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