YAY!
Dancing with the Stars is back!
Boo that it's only four weeks long this season!
Here we go...
1) Chris Mazdzer (luge) and Witney
Salsa
He was not terrible!
First of all, he's hot.
There is no second of all.
He's just hot.
He did rush, so his timing was off. He doesn't have great rhythm, at least not yet. But he's hot. He looked great out there. The lifts and tricks were very exciting, and pretty well-executed, after the first one, which bordered on disaster.
And did I mention he's smokin' hot?
Len: "so impressed with you - style, confidence"
Bruno: "broke the ice nicely, good hip action, very exciting"
Carrie Ann: "You are incredible - choreography was jam-packed - star quality"
Scores: 7, 7, 7
My score: 7 (for the dancing, 9 for the hotness)
2) Kareen Abdul-Jabbar (basketball) and Lindsay
Cha Cha
He is 7'1''; she is 5'4'' (Oh my!)
Extra dancers - ugh!!
Um...honestly the performance pained me. He is SO tall and SO thin. I just had horrible visions of him falling and shattering into dozens of pieces on the dance floor. I certainly hope he's on bone-building medication (get your minds out of the gutter, I'm talking about osteoporosis!) He smiled and looked happy, but his dancing had no rhythm or musicality. He basically stood there and let the women dance around him. Yikes. Not good. I'm sorry.
Bruno: "simple, dignified"
Carrie Ann: "You entertained us but you need to get groovier"
Len: "You gave it your all but you need to loosen up"
Scores: 6, 5, 6
My score: 5
He's 71 years old AND a cancer survivor?! Now I feel bad about my comments and my score. But I have to judge the dance.
3) Jennie Finch-Dagle (softball) and Keo
Foxtrot
Given Keo's unfortunate track record with ballroom partners, I'm so happy to see him paired with someone who can dance! It was a solid performance - nice frame, musicality, and ease of movement. It was a sweet, down-home on the farm dance with a cameo by her three kids at the end. "Dancing with the Stars" viewers will likely eat that up like it was apple pie topped with Blue Bell ice cream (my Texas roots are showing).
Carrie Ann: "a joy to watch, good student"
Len: "elements of control and flair, good job"
Bruno: "airy breeze and fresh quality - needed more control"
Scores: 7, 7, 7
My score: 7
4) Jamie Anderson (snowboarding) and Artem
Viennese Waltz
Yay for the return of Artem's natural hair color!
I was not a fan of the blond phase.
Okay, she was clearly nervous, she was hesitant, but Artem's strong arms - I mean partnering skills - and a great song elevated this performance. She was a bit clumsy at times, but she looked elegant, and there were moments of gracefulness. Overall good for a first dance.
Len: "a little skippy, but elegance and personality"
Bruno: "hit a slippery patch - never lose the flow"
Carrie Ann: "beauty, artistry, but you were nervous and rushing"
Scores: 6, 7, 6
My score: 6
5) Mirai Nagasu (skating) and Alan
Salsa
Oh hell yeah, she's a star on the dance floor now too!
Fantastic routine!
Sexy, hot, terrific tricks, musicality, star quality
They look amazing together and have wonderful chemistry.
Mirai is a contender for sure!
Go girl!
I loved it!
Bruno: "spicy, crispy-cracker of a salsa!"
Carrie Ann: "you're a boss - You owned that dance!"
Len: "full of vigor and vitality"
Scores: 7, 8, 8
My score: 8
6) Arike Ogunbowale (basketball) and Gleb
Salsa
Well, the extra dancers and her choice of footwear made me grumpy. This is a dance competition - She should have been in heels. It was also a rather short dance so I'm struggling to critique it. She did not do nearly as well as Mirai and the powers that be should not have put two Salsa numbers back to back when one was obviously so much stronger than the other. She had good energy, but that's about all I can say about the performance. The dance was just not very memorable for me, except for negative aspects like the extra dancers.
Carrie Ann: "You've got your own style - but you need heels"
Len: "energetic, but needed more hip action"
Bruno: "shaking it up"
Scores: 7, 6, 7
My score: 7
7) Adam Rippon (skating) and Jenna
Cha Cha
OMG, Adam dancing to RuPaul's "Sissy That Walk" was everything!!!
I don't know how mainstream "Dancing with the Stars" America will feel about the song and the performance, but I was gagging! (I predict less than three people who read this review are "Drag Race" fans that will understand what that means. Translation: It was off the chain! Second translation: It was fantastic!)
He had amazeballs chemistry with Jenna, his strutting (I mean dancing) was crisp and tight; it was a high energy, exciting routine.
He owned that catwalk! (I mean dance floor!)
Yes, I did see him fall out of the pirouette. I don't care. He was still the bomb.
Work it!
Bruno will lose his shit, I guarantee.
Len: "good, sharp, crisp, clear, lots of Cha Cha content"
Bruno: "hip action of a devil, great synchronicity with Jenna"
Carrie Ann: "You were born to do this show"
Scores: 8, 8, 8
My score: 8
8) Johnny Damon (baseball) and Emma
Foxtrot
Not a disaster, but definitely a work in progress. Too rushed, sloppy, bad footwork, very hunched frame in places - but he's a hoot and it was an entertaining routine. I bet he's a super fun dad.
I was worried for Emma a few times, but she appeared to survive the dance unscathed.
Bruno: "happy, shuffling along"
Carrie Ann: "You're adorable"
Len: "difficult, but I salute you"
Scores: 6, 6, 6
My score: 6
9) Tanya Harding (skating) and Sasha
Foxtrot
Tanya possesses such an interesting mix of bravado and insecurity. She said she's not graceful, but that was a lovely, elegant, and in my opinion, inspirational dance. Tanya has been alienated from the sport she loved for years. Her passion as well as her livelihood were stripped from her. Now she's getting the chance to compete again, and competing she is - with her heart and her talent. Good for you, Tanya! I'm rooting for you! That was a beautiful routine. My one picky comment has nothing to do with her dancing, or the choreography. My gripe is with the wardrobe department. Who decided to put her in that Waltons-era drab housewife dress? It was such a boring costume. This is Dancing with the Stars, people, and as we know, Tanya is no stranger to a glitzy performance outfit.
Carrie Ann: "You are a beautiful dancer, blew me away"
Len: "charming dance, lovely performance"
Bruno: "lyrical quality"
Scores: 8, 8, 7
My score: 8
10) Josh Norman (football) and Sharna
Cha Cha
Did I see a lot of Cha Cha content?
No
Did I care?
Not really
The choreography made him look like a dancer.
The red jacket with no shirt made him look damn fine.
His chemistry with Sharna was blazing.
It all worked for me.
They can have more content next week.
If they want to
Len: "full or rhythm and style"
Bruno: "star quality, charisma, sex appeal, natural musicality"
Carrie Ann: "X-factor, fly guy"
Scores: 8, 8, 8
My score: 8
Jamie and Artem and Johnny and Emma were eliminated at the end of the show.
In my opinion, it should have been Johnny and Kareem.
Tanya and Sasha were in the bottom as well. Travesty!
Thanks for reading dance fans!
librarianintx
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