Spending Money

It's scary how much fun spending money can be. There can be a high associated with it. This year I have been more careful than ever with my money. I freaked out when our apartment complex increased our rent by $80 several months ago. I had been pinching pennies even before that, but when that happened I started spending even less. I keep a list every month of how much I spend and what I'm spending my money on. If I buy a bag of chips, I write it down.

I changed my buying habits at the grocery store. I purchase roma tomatoes now; they are the cheapest. Instead of saltines or Ritz, I buy a bag of oyster crackers for $1. HEB bread is cheaper than Mrs. Baird's. I try to buy only what I can eat in a week; I don't stock up. I make a list and I stick to it. I eat a lot of beans and rice. And hot cereal. When I cook, I make a pot of chili or spaghetti that will last me about a week. I eat out rarely if I'm paying. One thing I allow myself is a trip to Central Market, where I buy a prepared container of chicken salad, pasta salad, and fresh fruit. The container costs less than $6, and is the perfect size for me for lunch.

So I have been super careful so far this year. Plus I got a small raise at work, and I was scoring tests online for a few months to make some extra money. All of this has resulted in a savings every month. Some months I have been able to save several hundred dollars. That makes me feel proud and relieved. But it also makes me feel too comfortable, like it would be okay to maybe relax my strict spending a bit. I don't want to think that way. I want to continue saving. And I want to find more ways of making extra money.

I'm doing okay right now on a month to month basis. And I'm not completely denying myself. Not at all. I bought several dresses this summer. I've been out to eat a few times. I even bought an inexpensive netbook - my wonderful friends bought it and are letting me pay it off in monthly installments, which helps greatly. But I worry about if and when I have a big expense - if I get sick and need medicine, or a medical test, or even surgery. I just went to the dentist and was relieved that all was well - no cavities and the co-pay was wonderfully low. But anything can happen. I could fall and break something. I have insurance, but the cost would still be very high. So I have to remain vigilant.

But there is something else I want - a new i-pod. I had a great one, but it died, and for now I have a hand-me-down from my sister's family. It doesn't hold much music, won't sync audiobooks for some reason, and only holds a charge for about an hour. I told myself if I made some extra money this summer, and if I went to the dentist and all went well with that, then I would allow myself the luxury of a new i-pod. I DID make some extra money this summer, and I DID go to the dentist. I have more than enough saved this year to buy the i-pod. But I'm still nervous about making the purchase. What if I get it, and then something goes wrong and I need the money I just used for something frivolous? What if I buy it, and the excitement I derive from getting it for myself makes me want to spend money on other luxuries? I use my smartphone a lot and it is several years old; maybe I should spend the money on a new phone instead?

A top of the line i-pod is over $400. That is a lot of money to spend on myself. That is twice as much as the netbook I'm paying off. I have to remember that the holidays are approaching, plus two nieces are graduating from college soon, and one of those two nieces is also getting married next May. So a lot of gift-buying is in my fairly immediate future.

So there is both excitement and nervousness when it comes to money, and I'm working on finding a balance between saving and spending. I probably will get the i-pod. And I will feel happy and proud and guilty all at the same time. That's me!

librarianintx