Yesterday I got some blood test results back, and the news wasn't great. My carbon dioxide levels are elevated again, which may or may not explain the fatigue and headaches that I'm experiencing. Luckily there are measures my doctor can try to lower it again, although he's taking a "wait and see" approach at the moment. Part of me is relieved that there might be a physical explanation for the way I've been feeling, but another part of me is frustrated because I use the nighttime ventilation EVERY night, no exceptions, and that is supposed to keep the CO2 levels within normal range. But I have to remember that our bodies change, and what worked for a long time isn't necessarily going to work forever.
When I was feeling a little upset about the results, I was on Facebook, and discovered that an acquaintance with the same condition I have is in the hospital with a collapsed lung. I don't know her well, and I've never met her, but I do know she has struggled much more with our shared disability than I have. I felt bad for her, and at the same time grateful and relieved for myself. I might be struggling a bit lately, but I'm still keeping up with my normal routine.
I'm making it to work.
I'm taking care of myself.
I'm not in the hospital.
I have much to be thankful for.
Chronic conditions are very challenging to deal with. Fatigue, pain, and other symptoms can make life a daily struggle. But focusing on the positive and emphasizing gratefulness can definitely help.
librarianintx
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